写给黄星星和可乐的第一封信
截图源自作者手机日历提醒💛
screenshot from the author's phone💛
写在前面
Prologue
会有这篇推送是因为我的挚友黄星星今早发动，母子平安，目前正在休息。新手爸爸估计正在努力掌握技能中，恭喜这个幸福的家庭！
This post is for my best friend Huang Xingxing who gave birth this morning. Now she is resting with baby near her bed. The new father probably is trying to master skills to take care of the newborn and his partner, congrats to the happy family!
远在伦敦的我决定刷一刷存在感。毕竟也不知道归期是何时，还是尽早把想说的话都说了比较好。昨天晚上困得比较早，所以没有更新推送。看来也是冥冥之中要让我在今天使用一下每天更新一次的权限。
I am physically far from them, here in London alone, I decide to write something to remember the moment. After all, I have no idea when I will be back, so it is better that I say everything I want to say. I was sleepy last night so did not update my daily post. I can only post once per day, so guess there is some fate.
(The parents have not decided the English name for the baby so I choose not to just translate the Chinese nickname yet, just refer to him as the baby)
第一封信
The first letter
2020年3月18日 伦敦 阴天☁️
18th March 2020 London cloudy ☁️
给黄星星和新生儿：
To the new mum and baby:
你们终于相见啦，现在可以安心入睡，祝贺你们成功在地球相遇！
You both have worked so hard to meet each other. Now, have a nice sleep and congrats to both of you for making this journey on our planet earth!
目前整个世界都在经历着严峻的考验，在产房之外，千里之外，都有很多人和一种叫做新冠病毒的全球性传染病抗争。
Now the whole world is facing a serious challenge, outside your room, one thousand miles away, there are many people fighting against a pandemic caused by the coronavirus called COVID-19.
诶，还没给可乐介绍我自己，你可以和你妈妈一样叫我呆缪（发音：Damuel）吧～可以加阿姨，但我觉得也可以不加让我装个嫩。我应该会是你妈妈将来会和你提起的一个奇怪的阿姨。
I have not introduced myself properly, call me Damuel as your mum made up this nickname for me. It is okay if you do not want to add aunty after my name. I think I am supposed to be a strange aunty that you mum will refer to.
在你妈妈黄星星还不是你妈妈，还是一个少女的时候，我们曾经是四年的室友，大学毕业之后我们在不同的城市，但还有一起旅行，也有见过好几面。在你爸妈还在谈恋爱的时候，我就见过你爸爸。在你还在妈妈肚子里的时候，我还来看过你。
When your mum is not your mum, still a young girl, we were roommates for four years in our univeristy. After graduation, we were in different cities but still managed to travel together, and tried our best to meet each other. When your father was her boyfriend, I paid a visit to know him. When you were inside your mum, I also visited you.
对了我想先说一句：辛苦了，黄星星。之后你不仅是我的挚友黄星星，也还会是可乐这个小宝宝的妈妈，当然还是某人的人生伴侣。这些角色我想你应该能处理得好，但如果有时候觉得很累的话，也请一定要告诉身边的人以及我，我们这些爱你、你也爱的人不会让你成为超人。我们会继续让你保留一个可以做普通人黄星星的时间。
And first I want to say: Good job, Huang Xingxing. From now on, you will not only be my best friend Huang Xingxing, you will also be a little baby's mum, and of course someone's lifelong partner. I think you will deal well with all these roles, but in case you feel like overwhelmed, please do feel free to tell the beloved ones nearby and me, people who you love and love you will not make you a super woman. We will try to make sure you still have sometime to be an ordinary person Huang Xingxing.
现在和可乐说话，现在你爸爸也陪伴在你们母子身边。根据他以往的优秀表现，我认为他会是很靠谱的，能够照顾好你们两位。而且可乐也是爸爸的孩子，不只是妈妈的宝贝，所以我想可乐也会在你爸妈以及其他人的照顾下度过一个有很多美好回忆的童年，然后在学校里接受挺有意思的教育，认识更多的朋友，也做到更多事情。但现在，可乐你要喝好睡好。
Now I am speaking to you, the baby, your father is with you two. According to his excellent previous performance, I think he is a trustworthy adult that can take care of you two. And you are also his kid, not just mum's baby, so I think you will have a childhood with many beautiful memories with your parents, extended family and other people who will take care of you. And I am sure you will also have fun education in school, get to make more friends and become more capable of doing more. But now, all you need is to sleep well and eat well.
我在可乐你出生前三天还特地和黄星星（也就是你的妈妈）视频，才了解到原来去医院生孩子要带好多东西去。我只截取了很少一部分的行李（有一张图）。在你出生后，你妈妈和爸爸不仅要照顾你，而且你妈妈的身体还需要很长时间的调理才能恢复到平时的状态。可乐你是不是会觉得奇怪为什么一个人可以为另一个人做到这么多？
Three days ago before your birth, I had a video chat with Huang Xingxing (i.e. your mum), and then I got to know there are more luggages than I expected. I had a quick screenshot of a tiny part of the preparation your mum did. After your birth, your parents will not only take care of you, your mum will also need several months to get back to the normal life she has. Will you feel strange that: why can one person do so much for another person?
2020年3月13日的截图
screenshot at 13th March 2020
这个答案是爱。
The answer is love.
你妈妈对你的爱叫做母爱，你爸爸对你的爱叫做父爱。这两种爱会是你成长过程中越来越感受到的。在我看来，这两种爱只所以诞生，是因为你是父母爱情的结晶。所以最早的这个爱，你只所以会来到这个世界上，是因为你的父母相爱。这是一个非常美好的过程，当然你的父母也经历了许多考验，这也让你父母更相信彼此是人生中最重要的人，并且愿意让对彼此的爱在你身上得到延续。
The love you get from your mother is called mother's love. The love you get from your father is called father's love. The two love will grow stronger as you can feel more. From what I see, the love you get from them is because you are a baby born from their love. So initially, you can come to this world because your parents love each other so much. It is a incredible process and your parents both faced many challenenges, these also ensure that they think each other is the most important person in their lives. And they are willing to continue the love to each other by having you.
或许有一天可乐你会发现爸爸妈妈都非常爱你，但他们更爱彼此。这或许会让小可乐有一点失落，但是你要意识到你不需要争取成为父母最爱的那个人，父母爱你也给你提供足够的空间成长就足够了。因为你会长大，还很可能会离开家庭，建立一个新的家庭，就像你父母做的一样。而你的父母才是彼此携手共度一生的人。而可乐就像你父母做的一样，遇见一个你爱也爱你的人，或许也会选择给世界带来一个新生命，让爱延续下去。
Maybe one day you will realise that your parents both love you so much but they actually love each other more than they love you. This may make you a bit disappointed, however, you need to realise that you do not need to become the most beloved person to them, as long as they love you and give you enough space to grow. Since you will grow up, and probably leave your parents' house to start a new family, like what they did to their parents. Your parents will keep holding each other's hands and live their lives together till the end. And you, may do what you parents do, find someone you love and love you back, perhaps you will also choose to bring a new life to this world, to let the love between you two continue.
或许这对于一个新生儿来说有点太早了，但或许你能看懂文字的时候，你妈妈会让你再看这封信，那至少有三点我希望没有被遗忘：
Maybe it is too early for a newborn, but I do think it is essential that to your family, and your mum may forward this letter to you when you can read, I think three things should not be forgotten:
1.你的父母爱彼此也爱你，他们更爱彼此甚过爱你，因为他们除了是你的父母之外，也是彼此认定的人生伴侣。而且万一他们两人全都只爱你不爱彼此了，你可能也会窒息。
1. Your parents love each other and love you, and it is perfectly normal that they love each other more than love you as they are lifelong partners not just your parents. And you may feel hard to breathe if all they have in common is to love you.
2.你的妈妈不只是你的妈妈，所以不要希望妈妈时时刻刻都围绕着你在转。她也是你爸爸想要好好照顾的伴侣，也想好好陪伴你爸爸；她是我觉得很棒的朋友，应该也有很多和我有相似观点的朋友们；她是学校里学生很喜欢的黄老师，学校老师们觉得很靠谱的同事，同行们觉得很有才华与能力的地理老师；她是一个喜欢大自然和摄影，并且有点天赋的摄影师；她还是一个喜欢在厨房里跳舞但其实也会烘焙的人。
2. Your mum is not just your mum, so she cannot always be there just for you. She is also the partner that your father want to take good care, and she also want to be your father's companion；she is a friend I think is wonderful to have, and probably there are many of her friends think similar; she is a teacher liked by many students and appreciated by colleagues for her profession and capabilities; she is also an amateur but talented photographer who enjoys and can capture the beauty of nature; she is also a person who can dance in the kitchen and also capable of bakery.
3.可乐你出生和成长在一个爱你的家庭，但其实并非每个孩子都有你这样的幸福。所以你不要觉得给你的爱都是理所当然的，要对珍惜爱护你的人好一点，不要吝啬给他们夸奖、表达你的爱。在大家都洗好手手，干净整洁的情况下，给爸爸妈妈和爱你的家人多一点拥抱。当然如果你有委屈，或者被误解了，不要保持沉默（似乎很多时候男孩子都觉得沉默是比较酷的表现，但他们是错的）。事实上其他人不住在你的脑子里，还是需要你说出来自己的感受和想法比较好。要记得家人是很爱你的， 但如果这种爱让你觉得不舒服了，或者让你受委屈了，你也要学会好好地说出来自己的感受。
3. You are so lucky to live in a family that you are loved, but in fact not all children have the happiness as you do. That is why you should not take their love for granted, be nice to people who cherish and protect you, do express your gratitude and love to them, telling them that they are doing good and you appreciate it. When you both have clean hands and faces, wear clean clothes, give your parents and people who love you a hug. And if you have been misunderstood, do not stay silent ( I know many boys think it is cool to say nothing and they are wrong), but in fact no one else live in your brain, it is better that you are willing to communicate. Remeber that your family love you, and if the love makes you uncomfortable or misunderstood, you also need to express for yourself.
我就先写到这里，真心期待你有一天会看到。
I will stop here and pray that one day you will read this letter.
呆缪（我现在是黄星星的朋友，希望将来也可以是可乐的朋友）
Damuel (I am Huang Xingxing's friend, and hope one day I can become your friend too)
2020.03.18 London 于伦敦